Mallaca.

Hey guys,

Today morning I woke up with a huge smile on my face, Student welcome tour, yeahhh! :D

So there are 10 of us, new students that are going to Mallaca,

And people usually take pictures and let the sights do the talking but since we are led by Miss Lyeah, Aaliyah (Member of Student Welcome team) and Aiman, the photographer, I've this amazing opportunity to write. 

So there's an amazing photographer for us. 

So no need to tap your fingers too much. 

Its 9:33 AM, SAT, AUG 24, 2013, 

And we're on our way to Mallaca,

Talking about the history of Mallaca, 

The story narrated by Aaliyah gave us the idea that Mallaca was where it all started...  

"

In the 15th century, there once lived a Prince named Parameswara, originally from Sumatera (Indonesia) came to the shore of Malacca. Back then, Malacca was nothing but just an empty land. He sat under a tree, resting, when his dog started to bark. He peered closely and he saw that his dog was barking at a deer. What he saw after that surprised him, his dog barked at the deer and the deer kicked his dog into the river. He then decided, with his royalty instinct, that the land can become a country, and he be the ruler. 

"

And it's said that the tree he sat under was named Malacca. 

So we are taking pictures, taking about our home countries, languages,

Fighting over BlackBerry, Android and iPhone, 

So you get the basic idea about how everyone is mixing up and Miss Lyeah just said I'm the noisiest in the Van . 

So I'll just  shush for now. 

" For those who do not know the past are condemned to repeat it. " ~ George Santayanna. 

So why are you going to Mallaca?

Yasser said -

" Last time I visited as a tourist to some Universities but did not look around, so now I want to go and see where Malaysia originated from. "

Abla said -

"I want to go to Mallaca because its a historic city where i can see how dutch architecture looks like . Furthermore I'd like to know more about the country I've chosen to continue my studies. "

I was going to Malacca, for more or less the same reasons, I like to have an idea about the roots of things,
Miss Lyeah calls me a curious student, I guess that answers your question.

A little after we left there was complete silence, and this is what went through my mind. 

There is silence,

For everything yet to come,

For memories to be made,

And moments to remember. 

There's a calm brushing here,

On the surface of every smile,

There's a secret behind every eye,

A ray of hope, for every crashing dream. 

Smile as much as you can,

And laugh, not many can,

For you're surrounded by people,

You love and people you cherish,

Smile for you're whole,

Smile for those who can't, 

For those who never will. 

~ Yours truly.

----

Malaysian highway is so green on both sides. 

And we're in Malacca now, here the sign boards say Melaka, 

The city is gorgeous and green, the roads are narrower than KL, which pretty much tells you about the historic demeanor of the place. 

And shocking revelation, Malacca has a branch of the Ramada hotel and suites in the heart of the city, just at the beginning of the tourist attractions and the old architecture. 

Which as said by a few of us is also in Abu Dhabi, Jeddah and Muscat. 

At the Christ Church Melaka (Anglican Church) 

Is a marble slab at the side that reads,

"Beneath this stone is interd, 

With her still born infant,

The remains of

Mrs Mary Betty

Who departed this life,

Sept 20th 1800:

Aged 30 years,

Her disconsolate husband,

Has caused this stone to be placed here,

As a snall mark of his regard,

For an amiable and afffectionate wife"

Everything here is preserved.

When you walk along the roads of this city,you feel like you've travelled back in time and are experiencing everything as you read, and say or hear. 

After looking around in the Church and the Dutch graveyard,

We took a tour on the cruise along the lake that was the first International port which the people from Netherlands, Arabs, Portuguese, Chinese, Indians and others used to sail into Malaysia back in the 15th Century. 

Aiman our amazing Photographer felt like Malacca had given us too much so he decided to leave his phone somewhere. 

Our best friend along the entire journey has got to be Haze, who took us from the Dutch Square to the Hang Tuah Plaza where we went crazy karting. 

Not once, twice and almost thrice,

But since we had to leave, we had Mr.Haze, direct us to Kuala Lumpur,

And in a hour and half we'll be there,

So until then,

Let's ask our lovelies what they loved the most about Malacca and this voyage, 

Harry said -

"

I liked melaka with histroical places, I liked the boat trip and, I had a nice time with my best new friends.  

"

Yasser said -

"

I like Malacca because there's a lot to see and learn about the Malaysian history, and ofcourse the Karting was amazing! 

"

Eldana said -

"

I like Malacca because of the karting and the snake!

"

Sakina said -

"Well, Melaka trip was awesome, for i got a chance to meet new people and enjoyed exploring the sites."

Abla el baroudi said -

"

In my point of view, the trip was all about the people who were in my company, the stuff who took us to diverse places where we can learn about the history of the first city of malaysia. The people were nice, the trip was fabulous and the karting was just awesome. Briefly, that was a wonderful experience. And one more thing the funniest thing is when Saad wore my sunglasses  ;) 

"

And last but not the least,

Student welcome member ~ Aaliyah Hasna said -

"

Malacca has always been my favorite place ever since i was a child. (I'm local so yolo.) The architecture and history has never cease to amaze me, no matter how matter times i've visited that place. With our fast growing technology and fancy buildings evolving in the city, it's nice to fall back into the past for a while. Walking through the narrow streets and old churches and houses really makes me feel like I'm part of a adventurous fairytale. I'm like freaking Merda (Tangled) in Malacca. Its what Malacca has to offer, which is relaxation and magic. If you listen really closely, the walls do speak to you and trees tells you what they have seen. 

I'm secretly a gypsy. I may as well start living in a caravan, read tarot cards, steal people's clothes, drink and dance all day. I love history way too much and I think I was a historian in my past life. Seems legit, doesn't it? :)"

They say there's no story heard best than from those who live it, 

And the 13 of us bring you little bits and pieces in pictures and pages here, of different cultures and various backgrounds, of things we learned from each other, the things we taught each other. 

And the things, together, we learnt. 

Once again, many thanks to the Student Welcome team for organising such an event for the new students, to learn and feel belonged. 

I Am A Writer.

I am a writer,
I cannot make you believe,
But I can make you read,
I can take you to places,
You've never been,
I can take you to places,
That have never been,
I can only show you,
But I cannot create,
For only he can,
Who has created me.


I am a writer,
And I can make you numb,
But I can make you read,
And let you feel again,
Such pain that you've never seen,
Such pain, that has never been,
I can only make you feel,
But I can't write to make you see,
For only he can,
Who has shown me.

The Student Welcome Group at Asia Pacific University.

Before I stepped in the Asia Pacific University, I wasn't sure what I was going to have to do,
I had so many questions in my mind,
And surrounded by faces of complete strangers during my journey to the Uni in the shuttle bus did NOT help one bit..
Until I entered the A.P.U Campus saw a group of smiling faces, greeting me very politely " Are you a new student? "

And you know that feeling when the clock gears fit right into place, and everything starts going how its supposed to,
That happened and I couldn't help but smile, following the group of students wearing a very catchy and attractive Tshirt, that said "Ask Me" at the back and "Student Welcome Team" at the front,

There were all my answers, everything I had been looking for.
I'm a stranger to Malaysia, Kuala Lumpur and Asia Pacific University,
And initially I thought I'd be lost and confused but in my whole entire life, I've never felt so welcome before,
And the entire credit obviously goes to the amazing Student welcome team.

They literally do everything for you, except for your signatures, obviously :| *Bad joke I know, but couldn't resist*

Well, be it student registrations, visa processes, medical check up,
And when I say Medical Check up, they take you to the clinic, submit your passports, fill most of the form out for you, and for someone coming from a thousand miles, far away from home... These tiny gestures are of the most important elements that make you feel less far away from home, in simple words.. Make you feel belonged.

So that's all the paper work and the boring stuff, what else is there?

There's a complimentary tour to Kuala Lumpur and Putrajaya city,

There's a tour to Mallaca, Port Dickson the beach, or Genting Highland, the amusement park.

Also...

Drum roll please.


There's a party, its a gorgeous cherry on top.

Again, organized and planned entirely by the Student Welcome group by the lake side campus at the Mines Resort.

If you're an International student like myself, and you're greeted with so much, you are bound to feel overwhelmed.

It makes you want to make extra effort and be the best you can, give the University all that you have to offer.

I'm a Muslim and I've made a mental note that when I go to the Surau (Mosque) for my prayer, I'll make sure I pray two rakahs nafil shukrana, for being so fortunate to have gotten this amazing batch of students to look up to, and to be a Student of Asia Pacific University.

Alhumdulillah (:

I'll be.

I'll be your world,
If you let me,
I will be your soul,
And I will shine through your eyes,
For your lover to love,
I will be soft and serene.
I can be beautiful, if I am you,
And for your smiles, I'll be weak.
I can be your world,
Or anything you ever want,
But like everything you've loved,
Will you hurt me too?

When the sun goes down,
I can keep you warm,
And in the heat,
I will make you shiver,
I can close your eyes,
And hold you tight,
For when you can't sleep at night,
I can read your eyes,
And never let you speak,
For when you cry,
I can be your weep.
But when the time comes,
Will I have to weep?
Will I need to cry?
When the times comes,
Will you hurt me too?

Unheard and Unnoticed.

Can we just run a few countries away?
Hide in everything we've never seen,
Hear the words we've never heard before,
And we'll live by our eyes, and words we'll scream,
Unheard and unnoticed,
We can be all we've ever wanted,
And no one will ever know.
No fingers will ever close our eyes,
Or tear our hearts apart,
Worlds away, we can live our world,
And everything we've ever wanted,
Can be ours..
Everything we've ever wanted,
Can be ours, in a few words,
Words that we'll never understand,
Words we've never say.

Guess I'm wishing my life away,
With these things I'll never say.

Coming out.

I know how you feel,
I know for I've been there,
I've burned the pages too,
And buried the ashes deepest possible,
Covered my hands, and smiles as much,
And I too, have cried and felt nothing,
I know you're lost and searching,
I know, cause I'm lost too.

I've been at your door step,
And I can see the shadows,
Even in the bright light,
There's so much darkness,
So much pain, and I sit and wait,
I'm counting on this nothingness,
The same nothingness that got me,
Opening my door, and coming out.

So I sit at your porch,
For the day when it all changed for me,
And I can't speak anymore,
I'm too scared to express,
For the time I felt the light,
And I squinted my eyes so hard,
I can't see anymore,
I can't feel but I'm here,
For when you open the door,
And peak into your porch,
I'll hold you,
I'll hug you,
So you can feel again...

We're beautiful

You're beautiful,

Those eyes on the corridor,

Or the number under your smiles,

On pages and papers will never really help,

The bills between your diaries,

Fortunes to be someone you're not,

Won't make you who you are,

Head to toe, we're all the same,

Sometimes we find it hard to believe,

But in moments of darkness,

When there is nothing but voice,

Of your thoughts,

Of who you are and all you want to be, 

Why do we feel belonged?

When there are no faces?

Or numbers to remind us of atrocities, 

We feel belonged and we smile,

With no eyes to see,

Thats when we are all beautiful,

In moments of darkness,

When we open ourselfs,

With no one to see, but to hear,

To feel and to belong. 

We're beautiful. 

Dream again

Look how far we've come,

We've just opened our eyes,

And we wake up to crying hearts,

Smudged eyes and torn sheets,

Are we too old to be young?

Do we know how lost we would be?

If we were wiser than this,

With more to say,

Than feel and keep inside,

For nights to cry and when the time comes,

To die alone. 

Look how far we've come,

Right here, last year,

We shared words, what today would be like,

Right here, last yeat,

We smashed bottles and rubbed our blood,

Together we sat and said,

"Together, forever"

And look at us now, 

Grey and old, in 52 weeks,

We've grown 52 and we're so tired,

To ever dream again, 

To ever need again,

Its too hard and too late,

We're too tired to dream again, 

If we were wiser than this, 

And wake up with dreams to remember,

Look towards the nights, not for tears or pain,

To dream again, before we die. 

Just to dream. 

Leaves

I knew this day would come,

All of these days,

One by one the leaves of my tree,

That family I made,

Here in this city,

They're letting go,

Its like fall,

And they're falling in different trees,

They're making room for new branches,

But I'm still here,

Waiting for my brances to grow,

And I'm looking down at all I've lost,

I knew this day would come,

Pieces of my being,

Still do smell of me,

In their new homes and places,

They remember be,

Like I write of them,

Here, giving fruits of tears,

Reminding all of you, that I too was a lot,

I had all my leaves making me who I am,

And with the fall, I'm changing,

But I'll be here, my leaves will leave,

But I'll be here, 

Someday they'll fall on me. 

And we'll be us again. 

Flashed life

In that moment,

When life has flashed infront of your eyes,

You're in tears and the truth goes by,

Regrets ate highlighted with the blood on the floor,

And your dreams are in rubble,

Beneathe all this fire. 

When you open your eyes,

And this calm passes over,

When everything sinks in,

And you're in the moment again,

Back in your body, 

Will you run and hide?

Or will you run and cry,

Tell them you love them, 

Everytime could be the last time, 

And every word could be the last, 

Will you call all truces?

And bury all guns. 

Do you want harsh words, 

And jibes and stabs?

To be the last of everything?

Don't you want to bury all hatchets? 

Will you wonder how this cruelty found you?

Will this darkness have a name?

Will you be okay with opening your eyes,

And find some of your grudges,

Gone forever with their lives flashed and forgotten,

Does this darkness have a name today?

Is it your name?

Some

Some will watch you fall,

Some will stand and frown,

Some might run around, be restless even,

But when you fall down,

I'll be there,

Before you, 

To make you feel like home. 

Some will make noise, 

When they watch you stride,

Some will point and maybe smile,

Some could turn around, and even swear,

And I do too,

I swear to you,

When my eyes fall on you,

I'll be there, right next to yours,

To stop mine from drowning me. 

Some will be under the cloaks,

When your fire works,

Some will be hiding in the dark,

There could be love in their eyes,

Maybe, maybe until they're hands are full,

And they'll leave your side,

And I will too,

But I promise,

I'll be there, lighting the fireworks,

Burning for you. 

Shooting stars

We'll be somewhere,

Where the stars fade,

We'll live long enough,

To watch them grow again, 

Like stars we'll walk under them, 

In flashes and false smiles,

For tomorrows pages and papers,

In moments we'll change our lives,

And strangers will make our days,

With what they feel, 

What we're afraid to say, 

We haven't winced or cried,

For broken promises and hearts,

Healing wounds and times. 

And on the way, like along the skies,

Some stars explode, someday they will,

On us. 

But since our time is yet to come,

They brush past us,

Like shooting stars, making us wish for more. 

Find me pages

Find me pages,

And love poems,

Read me words,

And written fate. 

Maybe I'll live again..

Give me reasons, to stay,

I'm about stand and walk away,

But every step,

Hurts a little more. 

If you give me pain,

I'll write again..

In my heart,

I'll scratch again and maybe,

This time I'll bleed. 

Stillness and falseness.

So today was the 3rd of August, wasn't it?

Yes, so it just another day, and I did everything I do, almost every other day.

I was breathing, I ate, and I felt fat.
I walked out on an argument, I won one, and I lost all the rest.
It was just another day, but everything felt different,
There was stillness everywhere, before I walked into the Gym..
Into the burst of adrenaline, familiar faces, and my trainer staring right at me,
He eyes read "Shoulders? Chest? Bi and tri? Back or Legs? What is it today son?"
But I motioned to him, with my goggles, that I'd swim this one out.

Although there were screams, and shouts, of everyone I've broken cells with, running that extra mile, figuratively, I heard nothing.

I changed into my swimming shorts whilst greeting those familiar faces again, in the changing room,
Talking of things unheard by me.

I was still engulfed in this silence I was trying to figure out.

I was scared as I shelter an ear problem, I was worried.
But I could listen to each and every word, I just couldn't hear it...

With these thoughts brushed off, I walked out into the open,
Next to the swimming pool, with the humid air that blew by, over the still water.

Yes, the swimming pool was still, there was no one, but soon that changed.

I jumped in, and I swam around for a while, then I heard it,
What this silence was all about, I heard my heart pounding,
My paused, and my limbs froze, I was in the middle of the pool, at the deep end and I saw the water pound,
And I could feel my pulse deep in my brain, more and more as I tried to pin point where it came from,

I closed my eyes and I tried to breathe, inside the water, yes, I tried breathing.
I was probably choking by now but my mind and my heart was in my heartbeat,
I kept trying to feel it, with my arms stretched out, trying to reach for something,
That could take me where I want to be,
And then I felt it fade, my eyes shot open,
This was my heartbeat, I had found it, and it was fading, slowing down.
It was inside me, and so was the water right now,
And this chlorinated water was winning, as I felt, heard and even saw my heartbeat fade,
With everything inside me burning, there was no more stillness,
There was no more confusion.
Everything started moving again, I saw people jump into the pool, I felt waves from their hands fogging my goggles,
And I felt someone hand pulling me outside,
I remember vomiting out the water, and breathing again, the air this time,
And there it was again, the stillness,
No sign of life, just stillness.

The Lucky One ~ Always the other.

We will all have our days,
We'll fall and stand up,
We will fall, and THEN stand up,
We'll stay tall, until skies fall down,
Crouch and jump, we'll be alive,
We'll bend but we WILL be alive,
We'll smile but alone, we'll cry.
We all will have that day,
When the heart drops,
It'll beat still, but it'll drop floors,
Of our deep chambers of secrets,
From our chest to our gut,
We'll be sick but we WILL smile.


And there will be some of us,
Some lucky ones, that are born short,
Of all the miseries,
To never have to bend,
Or be noticed if they're gloomy or glee,
If mended or broken,
Held together by themselves,
With smiles and lies,
Or just a few stitches,
And they can fall and crawl,
Wear label-less labels,
And talk of things never heard of,
They'll never be judged,
And these few people,
They will call us the lucky one.

The Time Capsule.

Press that red button,
And confess,
Hold your secrets,
Across the rooms for the whole world to see,
Speak out loud all the things inside,
If 50 years from now,
They open this capsule,
And you still breathe,
Will you believe?
The words that left your lips,
Will you cry?

Smile and look away,
When they speak of the dark room,
Bantered with secrets and tears,
And they nudge and question,
Raise eye brows,
To skip this 50 years,
And laugh at every word,
50 years from now,
You'll cry to.

Press that red button once again,
And erase with lies,
Fake smiles,
All your confessions from last night,
The truth about life, for every body,
Out there, listening, 50 years from today,
When they turn this capsule,
Erase the truth, let them suffer,
Don't stray them from love,
Don't stray them from hurt,
Betrayal and heartbreaks,
Let them feel this too,
Here what you feel in this room,
Bantered with secrets and tears,
You care enough to stay up nights,
And remember these words,
Wonder with clouds passing by,
Of their eyes, of their thoughts,
Will they change?
Do you want them to change?
If 50 years from now,
They open this capsule,
And you're still breathing,
Would you want them to know,
All that you found out,
With scars and stabs,
The words that left your lips.
Will they make you cry?

Window of time.

Miles may be plenty, for us its a window,
The distance that separates us all,
A few words that bring us closer,
A few places that we remember,
In darkness when the stars shine,
Like our dark moments,
We glow for the other,
When things get hard,
We bare our shoulders,
For all tears, and all the weights,
When things fall apart,
We find shovels and stitches,
Together we're all singing,
Until there is just this window,
The distance that seperates us,
Is a window of time,
A clock of misery,
With closed eyes, let there be none,
No memory to lose, no regret to feel,
When you blink right now,
Forget the hatred, as you read these words,
Remember love.
When you fly tonight,
If it feels dark, count stars,
Remember us,
We'll still be here, across the window of time,
A few hours separate us,
With a few words, let there be none.

Without you.

I stand here, on this bridge,
Crossing over to my sanity,
On me, I have a letter,
A tumbler, a picture cut in half,
I see you smiling at me,
With me, the other half, somewhere I threw,
Here at the edge,
I'll take a leap of faith tonight,
With the ashes of my memories,
Blowing off the lid,
I'll let go of your smiling face,
Rolled and dipped in memories of you,
Folded in a few words I've written for you,
If you ever stumble upon,
I want to thank you,
For all the scars and wounds,
For hurting me until I couldn't feel again,
Thank you for making me me,
And the long nights,
They've taught me patience,
Wanting all I ever did,
Has taught me life,
Given me hints of all the misery there can be,
Maybe someday I will be whole again,
Maybe with all I want,
Maybe with all I will need,
But someday, I know someday,
Without you, I'll be complete.

I close my eyes,
I turn around,
I know I haven't yet,
But I'm walking towards my sanity,
I know I'm not sane yet,
But I'm walking there.
I'll be there soon,
Without you.

Writing Pages

I'm sitting here writing pages,
They rest under my sheets,
Scribbling and printing every moment of every day,
Every word we said, I'm writing here.
How your pain pains me,
How you turn my days bright and warm,
All the little fragments, I know I'll forget.
All these little moments, I know I want to remember,
Sitting across you, I can see you weep,
This, I want to remember,
I apologise if I'm absent minded,
Right now, I'm assuring a memory,
I will sing to you, these pages,
This pain, will bring us closer,
I will read you all your words,
And wipe your tears of regret,
Of all the hate and the wait.
I am writing this, here right now,
To remind you of all the sorrow,
The dark nights, starless, gloomy.
Sitting across you,
I can feel you tumble,
I am writing here, right now,
Confessing to you, what I cannot,
Here with you, I cannot speak.
I cannot tell you, how I've jumped over,
Ducked under this table,
Travelled over and held you tight,
I've wiped your tears and set you right,
Look at me, I'm facing away,
Right now, I'm sitting across my weakness,
Somewhere when I read this to you,
I hope you forgive me,
For my absent mindedness.
I hope you remember I only did this,
Wishing on your falling tears,
More sacred than the shooting stars,
Wishing for your pain that pains me so much,
To remember this memory,
And read it to you.
Someday I will show you the best in you,
Someday when we confess,
Coming together with your pain,
I will hold your hand,
Uncover your eyes,
Of all the hurt and the blame,
All the scars you've been named for,
Let us travel the world,
Bring the pieces of your broken heart,
If you give me your hand,
I will mend you and give you love.
If you give me your love,
I will make promises, and keep you safe.
Give me your fears,
And together, we will be scared.
Give me your dreams,
And together, we will wish.
Give me everything.
I promise, I'll give you more.

Years from now.

I dream of this world,
Rinsed in purity,
With eyes, flushed of all dirt,
And their mind,
Cleansed and purified,
With hesitation, and threads,
Sewed are their lips,
And the words they speak,
Polished with shame,
Shining among the darkness,
Their thoughts are written,
Amidst the clouds,
Like the rainbow, and their smiles,
With the dew on the leaves,
Spreading from cheek to cheek,
As they fall from leaf to leaf.
I dream of this world,
Far from today, where there lies modesty,
And honesty, with no lies.
With no signs of secrets,
In their hearts or lives,
Pure love, like a well of truth.
And every residing soul,
Drenched in this truth,
With no backs, for the sharp eyes,
The cries heard of, in ancient stories,
I dream of this world,
Far from today,
Where there lies no heart breaks,
Guardians and protectors,
Strolling together,
Hand in hand,
With no shattered soul,
The truth, a book to be read,
To be drenched and lost in,
Words, heard and said,
Are the lies, in pages remain,
Of myths and legends,
Amongst the tale of heartbreaks.
Amongst the pages of bitterness,
Welcomed with cries, of years ago,
I dream of this world,
Years from now.

Read me.

Can you read me?
Like every eye here,
Can you judge me too?
Know what I've done,
And throw all the stones.
Can you carve my mistakes,
In the words you speak of me,
Do you do me justice?

I'll write my steps,
I'll spell all my mistakes,
I'll give you time,
Every word you utter,
Can be mine.
Every tear I shed,
Can give you reason,
Can tell you of my mistakes.
They'll guide you,
To judge me.
To speak of me.

Do I have to strip?
Let go of my guard,
Show you all the scars,
The hurts from protecting you.
Do I have to remind you?
Open your eyes, and let you see.
Do you remember?
Everytime I wiped your tears,
When you sat and cried?
Do you remember me?
Do I have to remind you again?
Of all the battles we fought,
For you, and your happiness.
Can you carve my mistakes,
In the words you speak of me,
Do you do me justice?

Tombstone.

In these memories that we bury here tonight,
After so many words that have rained on this ground,
Right here where we stand,
We'll never look back,
Your eyes, I know never will.
These very moments when we close our doors,
And we'll turn around,
No matter rain, or thunder, calm or storm,
We'll walk, away from this place,
This ground, between the mountains of our love,
The valley of our blood,
From the wounds for each other,
We'll dig up graves, all night while we fight,
For every work, spoken here,
For love that was born here,
And the promises made, scratched,
Lying there speaking on their skin,
Like our hearts here, tough as a stone,
Hard and unpleasant, how they shine in lies,
With pieces put together,
Holding everything unsaid, undone,
Together with these memories,
We'll bury our soul, our heart,
And we'll never look back,
Never remember this day,
After we walk away tonight,
We'll never remember our hearts,
And what they said...

"Here lies the promise,
To fight for love,
And to carve perfection, for one,
And for the other,
For every spoken word,
To be caressed and kept.
Here lies the promise of keeping promises."

Lies

If these are lies that make you smile,
Just hide your face, for a little longer,
Just for a little while,
Stay away, while my heart grows fonder.
Just let me go, before you look at me,
With your eyes on me, when you breathe softly,
Let me go, before these lies I see,
For just a little more, I'll be your baby.

Leave me alone when its time,
Leave me next to the sea.
Leave your hand on mine,
Before these lies I see.

Let there be no light, no shine.
When you close my eyes,
Let there be no love, nothing mine.
When you leave your goodbyes.
If there's a broken heart,
Or just pieces of us,
If there's a brand new stand,
Could it be us?

For all I know,
For all I've seen.
Its all a yes or no.
And what could have been

Into Nothingness.

We came so far,
Now I'm here alone,
There's no day in a week,
When I don't remember you,
When I do,
I go to that place,
Where words slip,
As I look at you,
And praise your heart,
I remember hearing those words,
In my voice,
As they came from my heart,
And I will remember,
All your lessons,
In moments of nothingness,
How you gave me life.
In times of confusion,
When you showed me the light.
I will always remember,
All you never saw,
Blinded by your beauty.
Beauty of your soul,
Beauty of your mind.
When I laid my eyes on you,
I remember,
The beauty of your smile.

I hear your voice,
When I cross these roads,
How you held your breath,
Just for my life.
When I took this falls,
You cried in pain,
With me in your arms,
You took me away,
To that place where words slip,
In praising you,
How everything seems sweet.
A little sour, with these tears,
When you're far away.
In this very moment,
Like the words for you,
These tears, fall for you.
In every precious moment,
These places fade away,
Deep into nothingness,
As I fall to my knees,
Falling for you.

In this darkness.

Somewhere in this darkness,
These lights that guide me,
To unknown places, and unknown turns,
With pits and traps,
Of all the luring signs here,
In the green of these trees,
Waving to me,
Saluting me, to hug them,
To sing to me,
Until the night falls apart,
And the sun shines down,
When I rise and shine,
Failing to prevail,
And these tears fall down,
Until these voices and sounds,
Noises fade and soothe me,
When I stretch my hands,
And reach out,
Take me, I stand here alone.
Reach out to me and embrace me.
Take my pain, soothe me a little.
Wipe my tears,
Maybe love me a little?

Giddy breathing.

Isn't it a beautiful giddy feeling,
Letting their smiles decide your day,
Isn't it a mystery, all your reeling.
When they fade, this weakness makes way.

Softer than the skin I've felt,
The feel of your cheeks on me,
If you hold me, in your arms, I'll melt.
You're beautiful, beautiful than all I'll see.

Aren't you the one I've been seeking?
Amidst the crowd, behind this darkness.
With all your secrets, are we breathing?
For they all fall, deep in love, for you, for your kindness.

Your book.

Look at me, all of me,
To all my flaws and scars,
I remember everytime I've been wrong,
I remember every mistake I've made,
From the dreams I've seen,
I'm close, so close to tears.
In this rain, I'm surprised.
Come in this rain,
Slowly, I've a book you read,
Page by page,
With every night that goes by,
With these memories,
Carving on our lives,
For every mistake I've made,
I'm sorry, from all of me.
I'm honest to all of you.
Memorise my pages,
I'm counting on you,
To remember my flaws and scars,
When I let you fall,
Just let me go,
Forgive me, for I'm only human,
And I'm open to you,
Honest and unspoken,
I'm a book to you.

Ignite.

When we give all we have,
Lay our weapons down,
Eye to eye, when I know you'll fall,
I'll run to you, to hold you.
To be the ground you fall on,
To claim your hurt and blame.
To seek forgiveness,
For all the wounds and scars,
When we lay these weapons down,
You break me and I grab my pieces,
Be whole again, to hold you,
When the sun sets,
Like your eyes,
The red of the sky.

We make history,
With so many tears and cries,
Falls and walls that we built.
We're home in each others arms,
Building the pits and traps,
Leading and alluring,
We plant kisses to the nets,
To all the thin wires that trigger,
The love and hate,
All together,
They ignite you and me.

Eleven Past Eleven

Sometimes we fall,
We stand up and learn how to walk.
On the pathways like this,
Like falling in love,
How these cobble stones,
Made to pierce hurt the same.
The fountains of smiles,
Dried by the heat of hate,
This hunger for love,
Turning water to wine,
And darkness to light,
Hallucinations of all we want.
All the little pieces left unturned.
All the blood stains,
Dried to look like paint.
Turning this colourless world,
Red, like the skies and the sun,
Love and hate,
Everything here, the same.
Dead, dull and red.

Sometimes when we walk away,
We learn how to forgive,
To forget and foresee,
To look away, from the shortcomings,
The soft punishments, we bare.
The silver linings that never shine,
And all the little things we want,
Tumble and fall, in the pile of hopes.
Fall down to pieces,
For a few wishes, at eleven, past eleven,
For these eleven nights,
Eleventh night tonight,
I wish the same, for a few smiles.
For the cost of love, I've fortunes to give.
In the brink of sunlight, that'll give us life.
Let the morning, let us learn again.
How to live alone, how to be alright,
You're made the same,
Just like the each shining star,
Never together, together they burst,
Like you and me, when we collide,
For our dreams are different,
Our hopes are different,
All we want is same,
But this eleventh night,
At eleven past eleven,
I wish for a wish, tomorrow at the same,
A day to ponder, on all that we've been,
Maybe tomorrow, I'll stand up,
And learn to walk,
Maybe tomorrow at eleven past eleven,
I'll forgive and forget.

Feet on mine.

Put your feet on mine,
Hold me tight,
When we breathe tonight,
Together, we'll break the dawn,
All these stars fall on us,
When our hearts beat together,
We'll smile and glide,
Sway in this cold,
Swift as this wind,
I'll be yours until forever,
With every word you say,
I'll give you love,
Stop time if you wish,
Until we love enough,
We'll love forever.

You to me.

Melting me with your eyes,
The soft curls falling on your shoulders,
Numbing my pain,
Your smile, lighting my darkness.
Giving me the way into your arms.
Pulling me closer with every heartbeat.
And when I close my eyes,
I miss perfection,
The charm of your face.
When I sit alone,
I feel your presence,
Running in my veins.
When we make memories,
You and me,
Holding hands and I read to you,
Read you to sleep.
I'll memorise your face,
Play with your hair,
Until your eyes flutter,
I'll kiss your cheeks,
And when you look into my eyes,
I'll pray for you,
For your smile to stay forever,
For your hand to stick to mine,
For me to be yours,
And you to be mine.

Memories of your mischeif.

Heart beat slows down,
Beauty fades,
The colours of my world,
Liquify and slip with my tears,
Changing my days to nights,
And the darkness prevails.
I miss you more,
With every word I read,
From your parchments,
The watermark of my tears,
Felt on my fingers,
Reminds me of the softness,
Of your voice and your nature.
Memories of your mischief.

Days like this

The sun is setting in my eyes,
The moon here shines in yours,
We together walk towards the stars,
They're everywhere, you're not alone.
If love was that I needed, baby,
You'd be all I need.
If this love was all that's holding me,
I'd be stronger than your defences.

Days like this, there's so bright,
So dull, when we close our eyes,
A small wish, a prayer,
Before we hold our pillows,
And sleep at night,
I'll wait for that day,
When, you're the other thing,
That crosses my mind,
Leaves me up at night,
When, for me,
You slip away those comforts,
Sit by the stars all night.
In your voice,
I'll find peace.
In mine,
You'll find comforts.

So many memories,
So many pictures on my walls,
The nightmare of yesterday,
Today, with your heart in mine,
Turns to dreams.
Dreams that came true.
With a few words you said,
Turning my cries to smile,
All my fumes, to sparks,
Tears of happiness.
When I feel you pulse,
Over my heart,
You feel your heart.
After my heartbeat.

The Darkest Silence.

This loud silence,
And the beautiful pain you've left.
Somewhere beneath my pale dark skin.
I find you living on me,
All these words that I never said,
You've heard in all my cries,
Tears when I laugh,
And these shivers when I'm warm.
For this pain,
Makes me scribble my ink,
All these beautiful tragedies.
And without you to hold,
To love, to cry for,
When these stars shine bright,
Without you to love.
Everything goes right.

This ember, this shining light,
Just for our eyes, you and me.
The words I say,
For some may hurt,
Some may pierce our love,
With softness and numbness,
Confusions of an innocent heart,
From right to tears,
The wrongs that hurt.
Enough to break the silence,
To raise voices,
To numb our hearts,
And to make me scribble,
Pain splattered words,
On my skin...
Dark and pale,
Under this shining moon.
The darkest silence.

My poetry.

You took my words and walked away,
My paper, my pen.
Gave me track of time,
With nights so long,
Tears that fall on my knees,
Searching for pages and words,
To destroy hopes and dreams.
Closer to love,
On a parchment, older than a memory.
Fading but still alive.
All my thoughts and words.
Give me my words.
Come back, my pen, my paper.
My poetry, where are you?

This is not me,
Without you,
I've made a living in your presence,
You, my corner stone,
My sanity, the sensitivity in me.
You're carrying my heart in yours,
Take those steps towards me,
Watch me withering here,
Struggling to say words I never remember,
Stammering on my breath,
Give me my answers,
My dreams and thoughts,
Give life to my tears,
Leave them on these memories.
Give the weakness to my knees,
With my eyes on yours, let me kneel.
Give me my sensitivity,
I'm letting empty pages burn,
Let me burn my words.
Give me my words.
My poetry, where are you?

Remembering you.

The softness of this tone,
Raising higher with the waves,
As my figners raise,
My hairs fly,
In this cold winter night,
I stand here, on this cliff,
Watching the clouds fade,
Into my heart,
As they crash into me,
Taking away from me,
My dreams, my reality.
Here, I stand again,
Months away from you,
From the memories that I burned,
Forgotten and forgiven by my conscience,
Here, I stand,
Burning myself again,
With your laugh,
The look in your eyes,
That chilly night when the clouds we raced,
The stars we dropped,
And they fell to the wishes of those,
Happily ever after,
Sitting on the windowsill,
Hand in hand, when we walked down this hill,
I remember that look in your eye,
I remember the warmth of your palm,
And here I stand, months later,
Burning myself with those memories,
Memories of me and you,
Here I stand,
Months later,
Remembering you.

Late night rants.

I miss looking into your eyes,
I did nothing,
Everything I had to say,
Walking to your door step,
The things I thought of,
The words I decided,
They just slip away,
When I look into your eyes,
And breathe, as we breathe,
Together we feel so easy.
All the pain fades,
And the brightness prevails.

I couldn't think anymore,
Without you putting me on edge,
Giving me reasons for better,
To run and hide,
To shine bright,
To out do all you do,
Its so hard to keep up,
And with you, its so hard to shine,
To be here, where darkness prevails,
It takes a lot of pain,
All these moments away,
Away from you,
From your love and your eyes.

The clock says 3,
And I'm right here,
A conversation over coffee,
With someone here,
The shadows that scare me,
Shadows that don't exist,
The footsteps that haunt me,
With nothing down the hallway,
I couldn't let you go,
The memories we made,
The reasons we tried,
They shine bright,
With flames of my love,
Amidst ashes that you left.
Still burning bright.
Like the stars tonight,
Closer and closer,
They hurt more,
Closer than ever,
They'll burn you.

How I could never take the blame.

(Marium)

Pleasant memories running in my mind,

Like the smell of an old book,

Of all the love that you gave,

And of all the love that i took.



(Saad)

Like the wind in these winter nights,

Colder than the lies I told,

Here beneath the moon,

I watch my demise unfold.







Standing infront of the mirror,

I can clearly see....





How i let you go away,

How my pride got in the way,

How things can never be the same,

How I could never take the blame







(Saad)

Underneath my skin, where love lies,

Lying to every smile with a smile,

When i fail to feel,

This love feels right for a while.





(Marium)

Late at night, when i miss you,

I remember the sound of your voice,

I try to call, but i realize,

I am the one who made this choice.







Standing infront of the mirror,

I can clearly see....





How i let you go away,

How my pride got in the way,

How things can never be the same,

How I could never take the blame



(Saad)

Surviving on hopes, that tomorrow you'll be mine,

Dying of regrets, why did I let you go?







Standing infront of the mirror,

I can clearly see....





How i let you go away,

How my pride got in the way,

How things can never be the same,

How I could never take the blame